Michael Gray

Is the BlogHer Conference Guilty of Sex Discrimination

Posted on July 21st, 2008
by Michael Gray in conference



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Last week July 18th through the 20th was this years BlogHer Conference. According to the Blogher website their mission is:

To create opportunities for women who blog to pursue exposure, education, community, and economic empowerment.

To those organizers I challenge them to look in the mirror and realize that you’ve now become the same evil and sexist pigs you started out with the goal of overcoming.

So whats my gripe, that Blogher limits their conference speakers to only women. Don’t believe me go to any of the past speaker lists (link, link, link, link) and try to find a speaker who is a man, do an on page search for “his”, “him”, or ” he”, now try searching for “her” her’s” or “she”, and you’ll see what I mean. It’s not that I don’t think that women aren’t qualified to speak, nothing could be farther from the truth, but I do ask the following question, if you want to provide the best conference are only women qualified to speak.

Now Blogher doesn’t completely discourage against men attending, here’s a flickr set of the BlogHer men attendees, including people like Robert Scoble. However if you are a man and you want to attend BlogHer, you’re treated like second class citizen, only to be seen and not heard.

Do you think Blogher should only have women speakers, what if I told you I was organizing a conference and only men were speaking? The only way women can get in was to pay the full admission price, and go sit quietly in the audience. Have a few choice names you’d like to call me after reading that, then why is it OK for blog her to do the exact same thing, and you’re OK with that, or somehow find that empoering?

The most common argument I’ll get is what about the “mommy bloggers” or “work at home moms (WHAM)” and how Blogher has speakers that can speak on those topics better than men. To that I counter Mommy bloggers and work at home moms face the same issues as Daddy bloggers and work at home dads. We all struggle to find the work-life balance. We struggle to run a professional business and to be available to take client calls and go to meetings, but to also be home by 3:30 to pickup the kids after school, bring them to dance class, ballet class, religious instruction, swim class, birthday parties, play dates, do the food shopping and cook a dinner that’s healthy and everybody will eat, without going crazy. And yes I do the food shopping, and I cook dinner, even on the holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving. So those aren’t “mommy” issues those are parent issues.

The next common argument I hear is that women weren’t/aren’t taken seriously, or accepted as part of mainstream media/publishing. This is a common argument from groups that are minorities or perceive themselves as minorities. They feel that by creating a group of only their members they can “swing the pendulum in the other direction” and create some sense of balance. Nothing could be farther from the truth. What it really does is underline and accentuate the differences between the two groups, strengthening the divisive wall between them. For example do you want to be known as the “best woman tech blogger”? I wouldn’t … what that really says is I may be the best woman tech blogger but when you compare me to all the male tech bloggers I don’t make the cut. You should never strive to be the best woman lawyer, best woman doctor, or best woman blogger, you should striver to be the best doctor, lawyer, or blogger, regardless of your gender.

Still not convinced Blogher hasn’t become their own worst enemy? Have you ever been to conference where a panel was made up of all men? How about an entire conference where all of the speakers where only men? Awkward aren’t they? I’m not advocating putting a “token woman” on the panel, because that’s wrong on so many levels. What I am saying is there are just as many smart women as there are men, and both are equally qualified to speak, and conference organizers should strive for balanced representation among speakers, not a lopsided selection to make up for past injustices.

So how bout it Blogher conference organizers can you rise to the challenge and create something more than a modern “old boys network”? If the organizers of “Take Our Daughters to Work Day” can change to “Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day” you can too. Being a visionary leader takes the courage to admit when you make a mistake and take the steps to fix it …

Update
see more dicussion from the blogher blog Mars & Venus in the Boardroom

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73 Responses to “Is the BlogHer Conference Guilty of Sex Discrimination”

  1. User GravatarRobert Says:

    Agreed 100%.

    However, dare I go back and mention that exclusive groups will always be there. I guess it only really becomes a problem when it’s a totally white male group.

    Racism, sexism and any other kind of discrimination is usually created by those wishing to overcome it. Like so many other cases these groups eventually become what they set out to overcome.

  2. User GravatarMikkel deMib Svendsen Says:

    Once again you made a very good pint, Michael! And its not just in conferences I see this issue. Its like these days its acceptable for Women to do and say all the things men are “not allowed” to.

    Why is it acceptable for women to emphasize what women do better than men, when the oposite is not?

    In fact, I think that hole men/women debate its quite stupid. I think it should be about people. Women are not the only ones that have been discriminated! Black people, disabled, asians, fat people, ugly people, old people all have the same issue. The issue is people! All groups of people have qualities and all should have equal rights to explore them.

    Michael, you say that a conference where women was told not to say a word would not be accepted. I agree - if we did such an event we would be labeled “sexist pigs”. Now imagine something even worse - a conference where black people was not allowed to speak up … No, that just wouldn’t fly, right. And it shouldn’t, I must say! It is stupid to keep some people out just because they are black, women, men, asians or fat!

  3. User GravatarAnuj Says:

    That is simply wrong. Any kind of discrimination is wrong.

    It reminds me of the wonder woman and her amazon civilization … they had a similar attitude toward men. :)

  4. User GravatarMindy Says:

    Nice post. Speaking as a woman (and a blogger), I don’t see how there’s any benefit to not getting male speakers on the panel if they can offer the best information - surely the goal is educating and you want the best you can get, not the best women you can get. I also don’t understand how, unless you’re running a convention about blogs aimed at women (e.g. mommy blogs, women’s health blogs, etc.) a women’s-only convention is helpful to women. It does perpetuate the idea that we aren’t taken seriously in the industry - and if we aren’t (and we are under-represented in technical fields across the board) - then surely planning a conference to discuss this and INVITING MEN AND ASKING THEIR OPINIONS is a far better way of addressing this issue than keeping men out.

    Having said that, I wasn’t at BlogHer so maybe this got done in some form or other?

  5. User GravatarBackpacking Dad Says:

    This post…I don’t want to get into a flame war over this, but my experience at BlogHer this year was utterly, 180 degrees, different from the way you’ve represented it here.

    BlogHer isn’t discriminatory along gender lines; but it is discriminatory along community lines. If you don’t participate in the community online then you probably aren’t going to have a good experience at the conference.

    And Doug French, aka Laid Off Dad, did speak at BlogHer during the highlighted Community Keynote on Friday. There was also a speicall session/meetup for men to talk about their experience at BlogHer (I didn’t see you there, did you miss it on the program?)

    They absolutely love seeing men at BlogHer and no one, except the men, acted as though they ought to be seen and not heard.

    You need to jump in with both feet in any community you want to be a part of, and if you don’t then you need to bear a huge load of responsibility for the outcome.

  6. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    Mike, glad to see the facts didn’t get in the way of your rant. Actually, Karl Erikson did lead a session at Blogher08:

    http://www.blogher.com/guides/blogher08/agendacontent.php?t=iphone&id=50

    You stated:

    “However if you are a man and you want to attend BlogHer, you’re treated like second class citizen, only to be seen and not heard.”

    Bzzt, also wrong. I attended a session in every time slot of the conference, and since the sessions are conversations with the folks in the room, I plenty of chance to engage in the dialogue. The Entrepreneurship panel, in particular, was a great conversation. And the politics panel took the time to go around to EVERY person in the room and get their perspective.

    Facts. They’re what’s for dinner.

  7. User Gravatardavematson Says:

    Michael,

    I think your post is unnecessarily inflammatory, and assumes facts not in evidence. While I certainly agree that everyone should aspire to be the “best” irrespective of gender, I can imagine that there may be some gender based variations in tactics and other areas. Women and men are different, may behave differently in some cases, and may be perceived differently.

    Taking a step back, is “To create opportunities for women who blog to pursue exposure, education, community, and economic empowerment” a reasonable mission, or a sexist mission? It seems reasonable enough to me on the surface. Are there fewer women bloggers? Are the challenges to building a blog audience different for women?

    I wouldn’t presume to know, but I don’t think it is inherently sexist to discuss the topic. Similarly, I don’t think it would be inherently sexist if there was a conference on expanding opportunities for men in nursing or some other women dominated profession.

    The second point is on the tactics. Were men treated as second class citizens and barred from speaking? Again, it doesn’t appear definitively that that was the case. But if that were true, then it’s just plain dumb. If there were an ideological bent in place that was in conflict with the stated goals of the conference, then to me it would be self defeating, and marginalizes whatever value the event might have.

  8. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @christopher carfi: running a “meet up” is not the same as being a speaker on a panel
  9. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    I want to re-iterate @backpackingdad:

    “Doug French, aka Laid Off Dad, did speak at BlogHer during the highlighted Community Keynote on Friday.”

    Indeed. He was one of the speakers at the best.damn.session. that I have EVER seen at a conference. The Community Keynote was game-changing. 200+ submissions, and the 21 best submissions were chosen to read their work, open-mic-stylee, in front of the 1,000+ attendees.

    It rocked, as did Doug.

  10. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    @michaelgray: right here:

    http://www.blogher.com/announcing-blogher-community-keynote-selections

  11. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @christopher carfi: speaking open mic is not the same as being on a panel
  12. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    no, it was actually significantly better.

  13. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    …since actually it appears his submission was chosen from 200+ submissions for that spot.

  14. User GravatarBackpacking Dad Says:

    @Michael Gray: Doug spoke in front of every attendee at BlogHer, and not just in front of a small panel audience. You’re right that it’s not the same as being on a panel. I’d say that was a little bit more valuable from a “get BlogHer to appreciate and respect male involvement” than anything else they could have done. The panels weren’t the most important part of BlogHer at all. Plenty of people skipped panels; they didn’t skip the keynote.

    You’ve resisted enough in these comments here despite the participation of guys who were there, on the ground, that I think you were just interested in the rant. That’s okay. Your blog.

  15. User Gravatarchristopher carfi Says:

    @michaelgray : it’s a community that can’t really be examined under glass from outside. i’d suggest going to the conference and/or participating in the online conversations to understand what’s really going on.

    anyway, not here to get into a semantic pissing contest. just wanted to correct a couple of factual errors. if you go to #blogher09, would be happy to buy you a beer.

  16. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Backpacking Dad: as a consultant being on a panel is very powerful lead generation tool, it confers authority, and expertise. being selected for an open mic session does not carry the same weight.
  17. User Gravatarjesse engle Says:

    This was my second BlogHer and I didn’t feel discriminated against in the least. I’ve said more than once, “it takes balls to go to BlogHer as a dude” but only because people look at you a little funny when you tell them you’re going to a conference for women bloggers. If I hadn’t been welcomed so warmly last year, I wouldn’t have returned.

  18. User GravatarLiz Henry Says:

    So, just curious Michael, what do you have to offer to BlogHer and in what way is your experience valuable to the community? How would you like to contribute and why is it important for a community of women who blog to hear you? Why would you like to be involved? Or are you speaking for other men who you think would be great allies for the women of BlogHer and would like to share their knowledge as panelists?

  19. User GravatarZach Says:

    Mike? (note: you spelt “empowering” wrong in your 4th paragraph)

    As a person who deals with large business deals, you should know better than to write something before checking to make sure you’re right.

    You are way off base, and out of touch here. Had you actually been to the conference you would have seen men participating in all areas of the conference. In fact the only way you could have missed it would have been if you were wearing blinders, and ear plugs.

    BlogHer as a company even has several men on staff, (obviously that’s gender discrimination!!) whom you could also have met had you possibly taken a better look at the conference. I don’t really know what sparked your misguided rant, this post of yours is highly insulting to the community and really unnecessary. But mostly, its just plain out of touch.

    Nothing is more embarrassing than someone who stands on a soapbox and has no actual facts Mike, your statement

    “However if you are a man and you want to attend BlogHer, you’re treated like second class citizen, only to be seen and not heard”

    Couldn’t be more wrong, men were all over the conference and having a great time, which again….you probably should of gone to the conference before getting on your soapbox, I really am shocked that you would write this having not even gone to the BlogHer conference. You need to do a MAJOR fact check. My only way to rationalize this post is that you want to get people fired up over a non-issue.

    Thanks for writing, next time, double check your facts please.

  20. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Liz Henry: I speak at many search industry related conferences such as SMX, SES, Pubcon here are some reviews

    http://www.bruceclay.com/blog/archives/2007/07/the_top_seos_gi_1.html
    http://www.bruceclay.com/blog/archives/2007/08/are_paid_links.html
    http://www.toprankblog.com/2007/08/session-are-paid-links-evil/
    http://www.seowife.com/ses-san-jose-2007/
    http://www.seroundtable.com/archives/014573.html

    What I’d feel would be most helpful to your attendees would be a instructions on how set up a blog that is search engine friendly. What are common mistakes that bloggers make when setting up a blog. How to spot and diagnose common technical blog problems and fix them. What are tools that bloggers should be using to make sure they are getting the most traffic from search engines and not shooting themselves in the foot.

  21. User Gravatarzchamu Says:

    Find a man who’s an expert on being a woman who blogs, and I’m sure they’d be welcomed on a panel.

  22. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Zach: yeah bad spelling it’s my trademark ;-)
    again not talking about ppl on staff or attendees, I’m talking about men being offered speaking slots on panels, which I have yet to find.
  23. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @zchamu: well I once ran a blog under a woman pseudonym and was asked to be on radio show interview … obviously I had to decline

    http://www.wolf-howl.com/blogs/when-a-pen-name-backfires/

  24. User GravatarPopular Wealth Says:

    I think Blogher has done a handsome job of garnering attention, such as in posts like this one, and for that I tip my hat. However I won’t be attending any events given that Blogher has crippled their potential by effectively eliminating at least one half of the population from their message. Although I am pro equality I and just not interested in gender based events. If you want to eliminate one half of the population from your program so be it, eliminate me too regardless of your gender bias.

    My two cents, not worth much after tax of course.

  25. User GravatarAllison Blass Says:

    I disagree that BlogHer is their own worst enemy. BlogHer was created to isolate a demographic and get to know their wants and needs as bloggers and as an audience (aka the “mommybloggers” from which so many companies desire attention). It was women talking to women about women’s issues. If a man is interested in that, more power to him. This isn’t about being the “best woman” anything or neglecting men. I saw quite a few men there because they were interested in the female point of view on the issues you described: parenting issues, work/life balance issues, and sexism issues. There are dozens of conferences that incorporate both sides of the coin, but more often than not they are heavily weighed towards men. This is an opportunity for women to not worry about competing with attention-whore A-list men but instead can speak their piece on the issues. No where in BlogHer’s website does it say “Men can’t come” or “Men can’t speak.” In fact, their materials *encourage* men to come and the fact you post otherwise is perpetuating a myth. See co-founder Jory Des Jardin’s post on men attending the conference: http://www.blogher.com/survival-guide-blogher-non-blogger-or-corporate-attendee. I spent quite a bit of time with BlogHer male attendees like JD Lasica, Jeremy Pepper, and Paull Young. I also saw Chris Carfi there. Were you there?

    There is also something to be said for women connecting with other women without interuptions from alpha-male, ego-driven men which populate the web 2.0 bubble. While you might think being the best “female” whatever is a bad thing, as a young woman, I think it’s a good thing because I know that just because someone is the best “female” doesn’t mean they are less than a man. It means that I have someone to look up to and say, Yes, I can be like her and be as good as a man in this field - if not better.

    Oh, and as far as the panel vs. keynote debate: the keynotes had far more influence than the panels. They keynotes were far more competitive and in turn, were far more inspiring and uplifting - which was the point of BlogHer. Your style of judging is not law, as you can see.

  26. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Allison Blass: as i understand it the “keynote speakers” you are all pointing to were voted on by the community not selected thru the normal process. So my argument still stands Are the blogher conference organizers guilty of discrimination by not choosing men for panelists.
  27. User GravatarBackpacking Dad Says:

    @Michael Gray

    actually, the keynote speakers were nominated by the community, and then selected by a committee appointed by BlogHer.

  28. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Backpacking Dad: so why is he not listed on the speakers page with all the other speakers? Because his speaking was not equivalent to panelist speaking position.
  29. User GravatarAllison Blass Says:

    See Backpacking Dad’s explanation. They were nominated, then selected by panel of BlogHer community members.

    Why is the keynote vs. panel debate so important to you? You apparently are the only one who cares about this. From my experiences, the keynote speakers at conferences were always the most important speaker because it was the person who spoke in front of EVERYONE. And if you don’t think keynotes are important, well, I’m pretty sure nobody else cares.

  30. User GravatarSEO Diva Says:

    I see your point, Michael, but I also remember at SMX Advanced in Seattle listening to all-male panel after all-male panel because they couldn’t “find” women to participate. Since I know of some truly kick-ass women in SEO and SEM, surely they could have found a someone for the the “Give it Up” session.

  31. User GravatarAllison Blass Says:

    It’s not discrimination if it’s a “women’s” conference. Deal with the fact you are not going to be invited to everything just because you are a man.

  32. User GravatarMikkel deMib Svendsen Says:

    > Deal with the fact you are not going to be invited to everything just because you are a man.

    So are you saying that it would be acceptable with a conference where Jews where not allowed, or blacks, or assians, or disabled people? Try and advertise that: No jews or blacks allowed! Good luck with that one! LOL

  33. User GravatarStuart Says:

    “So how bout it Blogher conference organizers can you rise to the challenge” … it will never happen. And no, I’m not a misogynist, I just see way too many women who simply aren’t prepared to face the challenges of mixing it in the real world.

    It’s more comfortable and ’safe’ to hide away and be precious in their own little enclaves.

    And like you Michael - I work from home and do much of the housework.

  34. User GravatarGeekMommy Says:

    I spent time with both Chris & Shawn @BlogHer08 this year - as well as many other BlogHims including folks like Andrew Hyde and Rick Calvert - and I’m fairly sure you’ll find that being there changes your perspective of it.

    You know that if you were writing this about a racial minority not having white speakers on their panels that you’d be crucified for it - but we’re just women after all, right? Keynote speakers and room-of-your-own panels aren’t good enough for you - because what? Speaking to hundreds of people rather than merely dozens is somehow less valid?

    I apologize for the sarcasm - but if you had gone and participated as both Chris & Shawn who are commenting to tell you how much your post missed the mark from those who have been there, your ‘outrage’ might come across as more reflective rather than just inflammatory.

  35. User GravatarDanny O Brien Says:

    Well, if your aim at a conference is to generate leads, confer authority on yourself, and give the impression of expertise, I can see why you’d be upset and why you’d be so confused as to how BlogHer chooses their speakers…

  36. User GravatarWill Says:

    I never quite understood the logic behind these reverse discrimination events. It somehow adds to the evolution of society by discriminating against the group that once discriminated against you?

  37. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @SEO Diva: Danny noted there no women on the SMX panel before it even started and apologized on the spot. If I understand it correctly they had a hard time finding ppl for the give up session as nobody wanted to give it up.
  38. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Allison Blass: so you are OK with men’s only social clubs excluding women then?
  39. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @GeekMommy: going to a conference where you are just as qualified to be a panel speaker but not considered because you are male is like being invited to thanksgiving dinner but not being allowed to sit at the grown ups table
  40. User GravatarAllison Blass Says:

    @MichaelGray: I realized after I posted that I didn’t really explain myself very well in that last comment. Having a conference where one certain type of person is the only one allowed to speak as an authority is radical. The topics that BlogHer chooses for their sessions are not necessarily topics that a man cannot speak on. The point though, in my opinion, is that this is an opportunity to highlight the work women do. Not to say that they are better or worse than men, but just to say that BlogHer is going to give women during this single conference the opportunity to control things, no matter the topic. Yes, this may seem discriminatory to some people, and it’s within your right to think that of course, but I think that it would serve men well to stop talking for once and actually listen to what women have to say. If there were a conference that was only led by a minority, perhaps African-Americans in business or Christians in business, I would be fine with that because the goal of the conference is to serve those people.

    I challenge you to interview one of the founders of BlogHer on your blog in order to get some of your questions answered. Have you spoken with them? Shared your concerns? It’s one thing to sit in your corner of the universe and lambast these women without their knowledge, it’s another thing entirely to actually bring forth your criticisms and request answers. Something you can do as a future post perhaps?

  41. User GravatarEve Says:

    There are actually lots of men’s-only clubs. And the Thanksgiving example is totally irrelevant. Are you offended because you weren’t invited? Did you ask to be a speaker?

    The thing about feminism that seems to escape many (men and women) is that women are actually treated as inferiors — the common example is salary disparity. A few readers have also brought up discrimination against Jews and blacks. Was anyone turned away based on race or gender? It doesn’t seem that’s the case. Are we to say that because there’s racism, we should ignore sexism? Minorities (in the case of women who are marginalized in many industries) sometimes find that building a community is empowering.

    The truth is that some discrimination is self-selecting — would you really want to go hang out somewhere you felt completely out of place? Probably not.

    I find it interesting that someone who didn’t attend (or attempt to attend) the event in question is so critical of it.

  42. User Gravatarzchamu Says:

    So, a question: Would you expect white people to sit on panels at a conference about bloggers of colour? Would you expect Christians to be on panels at a Jewish conference? It’s the same argument. If you’re having a conference targeted at a niche audience, you want speakers who have the same viewpoint, the same perspective in common with that audience. It isn’t discrimination: it’s simply catering to the wishes of your market. At BlogHer, the women attendees are interested in seeing women speak, in getting information from other women bloggers. This is one of the reasons why BlogHer is successful: the audience desires and prefers to talk to women experts, people who have faced the same challenges and struggles they have as women. BlogHer delivers on this.

    And I guess that’s the point that you’re missing. BlogHer doesn’t exist just to help people build out their resumes. It isn’t “just” a technology conference. It’s a community, an entity unto itself.

    Ultimately, it seems like you want the opportunity to speak to the BlogHer audience because you see it as a great way to build your resume. And I don’t think any speaker with those motivations would be welcomed at BlogHer, or anywhere else.

    I would suggest you start speaking *with* the BlogHer Audience. Start listening to them. If you really want to break in to BlogHer, then a great way to start would be participating in the community. You may be pleasantly surprised about what happens.

  43. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @zchamu: One could also argue that being insular and only allowing ideas from within your own community you will eventually stagnate. I believe that you can learn from anyone regardless of age, sex, or skin color, and thats the point.

    If you’re going to tell me the attendees only want to hear from women, I’ll tell you thats an even worse position to be in, as it shows the whole community isn’t open to new ideas, opinions or ways of thinking.

  44. User Gravatarkabin Says:

    They absolutely love seeing men at BlogHer and no one, except the men, acted as though they ought to be seen and not heard.

  45. User GravatarHoofs Says:

    Frankly, I think blogher would have been better off putting on a dog and pony show. They should have pretended to be looking at male candidates as speakers and then “coincidentally” only chosen women to speak. Would have been a lot less fireworks.

  46. User GravatarQualityGal Says:

    Now I wish I’d had the money to pony up and attend the conference so I could contribute more to this conversation. (And I understand your tweet from last week about shaking things up on your blog.)

    I had a REALLY long comment types up here, but I really don’t want to hijack your whole comment section. I thought it worked rather well as a blog post of my own.

    http://www.jimboykin.com/if-id-been-at-blogher-it-wouldnt-have-been-to-hear-graywolf-speak/

    The short version is that I was a face in the crowd of mommmybloggers a few weeks ago, and I had an invite to BlogHer. I couldn’t go because I couldn’t afford it, but if I had, I wouldn’t have been there to hear GrayWolf (or any other respected male speaker from the blogosphere) at the conference. I would’ve been there to hear from other women who could relate to me.

  47. User GravatarHelene Says:

    It’s important that you raise the point about male speakers. After attending BlogHer 08 I concluded that we blogging women would benefit greatly from the expertise and knowledge of many male bloggers and SEOers. Also, I was comparing the content of BlogHer to many male dominated blogging events and felt we need to aim much higher like the male bloggers who are making 6 figure incomes online!

    I think BlogHer09 should include male speakers, but I do think the other events being women only, is a nice way for us to bond, which we don’t get to do often.

  48. User Gravatarurbanbotanist Says:

    @Michael Gray - Unfortunately, I think that you would have stronger ground to stand on (albeit little) if you had actually been to the conference(s) and experienced it for yourself. Without first-hand experience, your post comes across as unsubstantiated and bitter.

    I’m a man who has been to 3 of the BlogHer conferences. I can tell you from first-hand experience that there is no sense of discrimination. While I can understand, to a certain degree, your questioning of why there have been no men (yet) on panels, I think that your rant is off-base and honestly, doesn’t put men in a good light. It is narcissistic men like you that led the BlogHer community to conduct a women-led conference to begin with.

    Every man I have talked to at BlogHer has had a similar feeling of really enjoying being a minority amongst 1000 women – who can blame them? I do think, however, that there is a future for men speakers at BlogHer, but that time has not arrived yet. The BlogHer community is still evolving and will no doubt expand its horizons (in many directions) as the community grows and evolves itself.

    Rather than lambasting the BlogHer conference and the company, why don’t you provide some constructive feedback or suggestions (after having attended) as to how/why a panel with men would be helpful to the community? I would highly recommend that you attend next year – I’m sure many of the men there (including myself) would be happy to generate a discussion about being a Mr. Mom. In fact, maybe this could be a the way to involve men next year: A panel on being a stay-at-home parent and how men and women approach and blog about their experiences differently…

  49. User GravatarRecycled Ham Says:

    “I can tell you from first-hand experience that there is no sense of discrimination.”

    Seems to me the entire conference is themed around discrimination. A conference for women where men aren’t allowed to speak. What’s next? Why don’t you make a conference that hearkens back to segregation. It doesn’t matter if there was a “sense of discrimination” at the actual event. I imagine there wasn’t necessarily a “sense of discrimination” at every single water fountain that only white people could drink out of either. I’m sure some water fountains were rather pleasant on the surface, despite the cruel reality of the reason they existed.

    What I would like to know is why so many people have gone ballistic over a Loren Feldman video that they didn’t even understand the point of (video here: http://www.1938media.com/where-are-the-black-tech-bloggers/ ) yet don’t seem to mind the existence of this conference. Where’s their moral outrage?

  50. User GravatarChris_D Says:

    Hey Michael,
    Great Linkbait article.
    And these young ‘uns think they know all about social media….
    :)

  51. User GravatarShamusM Says:

    Discrimination is empowering and should be encouraged, unless the group in question is both white and male. :)

  52. User GravatarJenny Says:

    On reading the first few paragraphs I felt that I was listening to a rant by someone who is bitter over some past event is his life. That was enough to put me off reading the rest of the drivel. I hope this blogger’s postings on his actual blog are a lot more entertaining, based on fact and not so filled with mindless rhetoric, otherwise the only visitors to the blog will have the same sad mindset.

    Michael, if you don’t like the concept of the conference, it’s quite simple: don’t go, you won’t be missed!

    What I am also struck by is Michael appears to be lacking a spell checker, and the grammar is appalling, the use of which I would have thought to be quite essential for a blogger?

    Get a life, Michael, or at least a spell checker!

  53. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Jenny: yeah Jenny you want to pick on my bad spelling and grammar go for it, I have no problem admitting they both suck.

    However despite my bad spelling and grammar I’ve been on CNet and Forbes because I actually know what I’m talking about … so I’ll keep my life thank you very much

  54. User Gravatarlizriz Says:

    It’s about solidarity, not separatism.

    And it’s a bit rich to judge discriminated groups for banding together and throwing their own party. We won’t let you in, but don’t you dare make your own space! Stay down! Because I said so!

    “However if you are a man and you want to attend BlogHer, you’re treated like second class citizen, only to be seen and not heard.” I honestly can’t imagine why you’d think that unless you came and were a giant ass in person. All the men I saw at BlogHer seemed to be having a great time and were welcomed to participate in the same way as all attendees.

    “…what if I told you I was organizing a conference and only men were speaking? The only way women can get in was to pay the full admission price, and go sit quietly in the audience.” That’s a joke, right? You’ve just described the actual situation in a lot of places! LOL BlogHer is one force that’s working to change that dynamic by giving women the opportunity to attend a conference and participate at all levels. From there, many women move on to participate in other spaces.

    However, I also would like to make the point that many, many of the women who attend BlogHer couldn’t afford to attend many of the more traditional tech conferences. I remember looking into one and actually gasping when I saw how much it was, but I can’t remember now what it was for. That’s one really unique aspect of BlogHer - you get A LOT of attendees who have absolutely no professional conference experience whatsoever.

    Personally, for me, I’m just now at the point where I’m considering attending other tech conferences. The cost is an issue for me, but also, I wonder if it’s even worth it for me right now as a personal blogger. If I can succeed and continue to grow in my own corner, perhaps I’ll give it another year with just BlogHer and my own corner of the blogosphere. Honestly, I want to save the time and money I’d spend at other conferences until I feel like I’m hitting a ceiling in my growth. I may be almost there; I’m considering attending BlogWorld if there’s a way to do it on the cheap.

  55. User GravatarStephan Spencer Says:

    This was the second BlogHer conference I attended, and I liked it a lot. My daughters came with me and liked it a lot too, particularly my oldest (Neopets blogger). It definitely is empowering and inspiring for women — and that’s exactly what I was hoping my daughters would get a good dose of. When I inquired last year with Elisa whether I could speak on an SEO panel, she informed me of the women-only speaker policy, but she was very nice about it and I certainly don’t feel wronged or unfairly-treated because of it. IMHO they are within their rights to set such a policy. It doesn’t bother me.

  56. User Gravatarpaisley Says:

    Mr. Graywolf..

    lmao.. linkbait?

    I’ve always wanted to speak at an naacp meeting to give a non-racist white person’s view, but i guess i’m the wrong color..

    however I would be topical… just not anyone that shows the advancement of colored people, unless you count tan people.. as i do resemble that remark.

    I would imagine if i was single, i’d probably hit up the BlogHer convention.. the female to male ratio would create a target rich environment..

    If i was an advertiser, (whom i do represent from time to time at the ad agency/pr firm i work at), the BlogHer convention would be a great segmented niche, female computer users. I think as males infiltrate their organization this would become less and less preferrable. also.. i think it would be kinda funny if you added the BlogHer widget to your blog, because you aren’t… female..

    also.. why would they pick you instead of someone like jane copeland, (Legal Issues for Blogging) AnnSmarty (SEO Tools) or heaven forbid that hagfish Jill Whalen, ok i know why i wouldn’t pick jill whalen.. but these BlogHer women might not know any better, she could tell them innaccurate things all day long if she chose to. so why would they want a man to speak when it’s a feminist love fest?

  57. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @lizriz: if you want to call out the other conferences that exclude women … please do … but to create a conference thats doing exactly the same thing they are … well two wrongs dont make right
  58. User GravatarLoralee Says:

    Actually, the men at BlogHer that I interacted with were treated like rockstars. Everyone loved them and I dare say they got way more attention than many of the female bloggers that were there.

    I was a bit surprised when I heard that men weren’t allowed on panels at BlogHer, but they were included everywhere else and there was a session that was specifically designed for them. Maybe that is not enough to placate you, but honestly, I see this as a niche-conference also and so I guess I can’t understand all the knicker-twisting about it. I wouldn’t expect to be on a panel at BlogHIM if there was ever such a thing. If I was barred from entry to the conference that would upset me, but I really don’t get into beefs with private organizations, religions, ect.that have regulations like this as long as there is not a perpetuation of hate going on.

    Just my 2-cents.

  59. User GravatarSnake on a Rake Says:

    “Michael, if you don’t like the concept of the conference, it’s quite simple: don’t go, you won’t be missed!”

    Oh, well, I may go next year and put signs outside the building that read, “This bigoted conference hates Wolf Howl!”

    Your conference now will forever be scarred by the fact that Wolf Howl and his supporters have exposed it for the discriminatory giant pig that it is.

    I look forward to a keynote at the next SMX about how Blogher is setting civilization back hundreds of years.

  60. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Snake on a Rake: again so you think that by creating a conference that’s biased the other way you are somehow compensating? two wrongs don’t make a right …
  61. User GravatarSnake on a Rake Says:

    I didn’t say anything about creating a conference that’s biased the other way. I just said there could be a keynote about how much damage Blogher is doing to society. That doesn’t make the entire conference biased. The equivalent would be creating a conference where women aren’t allowed to speak.

    Actually, I’d probably prefer to see a debate between a Blogher enthusiast and what I call a “reality embracer.” This “reality embracer” would understand that Blogher is setting back civilization and would attempt to convince the Blogher evangelist that Blogher needs to be reformed or eradicated. This debate could be the main event at SMX instead of a keynote.

  62. User Gravatardana Says:

    You are describing BlogHer in a negative way, and I don’t think it’s warranted. I understand your frustration. The organization may appear sexist you you, a man, but BlogHer was not created to discriminate against men. It was founded to bring women bloggers to the forefront of this new media, that is/was predominantly ruled by men. Because the conference is aimed at addressing women’s issues, naturally most if not ALL speakers are women — who better to understand women but women themselves?

    I’m positively certain that if and when a male speaker can share his expertise on women’s issues with the female blogosphere, he will be welcomed (with open arms!) to speak at BlogHer. Do you have any men you’d like to suggest as speakers, and if so, what topics or issues do they represent? I’d be more than happy to pass on your ideas to Lisa, Elisa and Jory.

  63. User GravatarLaurie Says:

    When there’s equality for women in tech and every other field, we won’t need a BlogHer. I did notice men at the conference, though the only one I actually heard speak was in the Infertility/Loss/Adoption seminar I attended. He had a sensitive and thoughtful comment that was very well received. Apparently he didn’t feel like he couldn’t participate.

    I am very grateful to the organizers for creating a place where women (and men) from all backgrounds can gather together to share what they are doing in a very welcoming and non-intimidating environment. I’m guessing there are not a whole lot of other conferences out there quite like this one!

    I would feel differently about the policy of women only speakers if I thought men had no other places to speak, but in fact they do. Men have plenty.

  64. User GravatarLara Says:

    Perhaps your desire to see men speak at a women’s blogging conference is much more about you need than it is about BlogHer’s alleged discrimination. Similarly, the example in one of the comments above about a non-racist white person speaking at an NAACP conference seems to be much more about what that non-racist white person wants or feels he/she needs than it is about the NAACP’s mission.
    I was at the conference. Men were welcome, as you have heard above several times. But the point of the conference was to engage with and learn from other female bloggers. Hearing a man speak on his expertise just isn’t what we signed up for, and the men who attended gave us much food for thought with their contributions. Again, and no disrespect intended, I think this is more about your wants and needs than it is about the issue of discrimination.

  65. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Lara: the issue remains business gets done at the conference, and being a speaker is an advantage to a consultant. With the no male speaking policy they are discriminating against men.

    Women complain they aren’t treated fairly and equally at the workplace, yet given the opportunity they create they exact same situation. You can’t say it’s unfair when everyone else does it, but OK when you do.

  66. User GravatarLara Says:

    But Michael, the conference isn’t just about work and business, and I disagree that it should be considered a “workplace”. If it were, I’d agree with you. If BlogHer didn’t hire men, that would be another issue. If it refused to allow men to attend, that would be another issue. Business “gets done” almost everywhere - on men’s and women’s softball leagues, in the single-gender locker rooms of athletic clubs, etc - but the purpose in those contexts is not always about business. BlogHer is about creating opportunity, and many who attend do so to connect and engage with their female blogging peers, not attend to “do business”. I think that contextual difference is important to note, and why - I think - BlogHer is not being discriminatory.

  67. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Lara: social clubs and country clubs that only allowed men to join were never about just doing business, yet women used that argument, and demanded to be allowed membership based on discrimination.

    You can’t eat your cake and have it too …

  68. User GravatarLara Says:

    Michael: I don’t agree we are comparing apples to apples here. BlogHer doesn’t discriminate on membership; anyone is allowed in their community. But for the sake of time,let’s agree to disagree.

  69. User GravatarMichelle Says:

    Sorry Michael, you cannot have a reasonable and logical discussion about this. Blogher discriminate pure and simple, but women realize they have the advantage because everything they do will always be in the name of ‘equality’, yet define any place in society were a equilibrium exists and I’ll be amazed. One of the many fallacies of modern feminism. BlogHer is just another website making money off of ‘empowering’ women.

  70. User GravatarNicole Simon Says:

    The reason you throw around this kind of bitter resentment against blogher is described best in your comment: “as a consultant being on a panel is very powerful lead generation tool, it confers authority, and expertise. ”

    Showing very good that even if there would be male speakers you would not be a good fit to choose from, as the goal of the conference is not about pitching yourself. You did read http://www.blogher.com/mars-and-venus-boardroom-or-blogher ? Btw, as a consultant, you would have had a MUCH easier time to connect with potential leads at blogher left and right than any other conference.

    But you would have had to show up and use the opportunity.

  71. User GravatarMichael Gray Says:
    @Nicole Simon: c’mon really you don’t believe all this web 2.0 social media stuff is about “connecting with people” do you? It’s customer service and advertising for the advertising averse. That “connecting with people in meaningful ways” is the BS sugar coating the madison avenue is silicon alley people want you believe so you think it’s different and special … and so they can charge you more … ;-)
  72. User GravatarFred Says:

    Great post man.

    My question and response is represented by the following letters:

    A C L U

    Where are they on defending gender equality or fair representation in this instance?

    I’m also waiting for the day Affirmative Action is represented in the NBA and we have more of a fair representation of the oppressed white athletes that is more authentically representational of the makeup of our society.

    Interesting how blatant people are about the uni-directional enforcement of rules or laws when it suits them.

  73. User GravatarKimberly Says:

    You are comparing apples and oranges! BlogHer isn’t really a conference about blogging but about the female perspective told via blogs. That’s what separates them from the 800 other conference about blogging.

    If BlogHer attendees just wanted to learn about SEO friendly blogs, monetization etc. they would go to one of the other conferences. I’ve yet to see a BlogWorld Expo breakout session about blogging about infertility, miscarriage and adoption.

    I’m happy to hear you speak anywhere it’s just that as a man you have little to offer us about SEO from a women’s perspective.

    As far as men at the conference being treated like “second class citizens” my husband attend as well and we didn’t even make him sit in the back of the room or parade around half dressed in the expo hall as eye candy!

    *also, don’t be so quick to pat yourself on the back for other blogging conferences being free from sexism. I’ve been groped at 2 conferences and found the lack of “booth bunnies” a refreshing change at BlogHer!* Nice linkbait tho!